Unmoved...Like a Rock

Today I was paging through a wonderful book with parallel saying from four of the world's great religions: Hinduism, Buddhism, Taoism, and Christianity, and I found this thought-provoking verse from the Buddhist Scripture, the Dhammapada:

(The book's title is Jesus, Buddha, Krishna, Lao Tzu: The Parallel Sayings by Richard Hooper)

"As a rock cannot be moved by the the wind, those who are wise cannot be moved by praise or blame."

Well! that eliminates me from the category of the wise. How about you? I am moved by praise.

I enjoy it, even though I sometimes feel embarrassed by an effusive compliment. And I enjoy praising others as a way of showing appreciation and support. Bring on the praise, as long as it is sincere! Why shouldn't I be moved by it?

As for blame....well, no, I don't like being blamed, even when I have done something to evoke another's blame. For one thing, I thing the whole blame game is pretty pointless and serves no positive purpose. It is also a tricky way for people to avoid taking responsibility for their own feelings and viewpoints. I think most of us fall into the blame game because we have learned to do it as we observe others around us, and it is easier than looking at ourselves to see what our own fault might be, or whether we are even seeing the situation accurately.

I know when other people blame me, especially if I feel it is done unfairly, I resent it and

tend to reject and resist the blame that is being laid on me.

Upon reflection, however, it is probably wiser if I say and do whatever I say and do, not in order to get praise or avoid blame, but because it's the right or best thing to do or say. In other words, if I allow praise and blame to sway me too much, I am living in reaction to the opinions of others rather than from within, from the core of my own integrity and convictions. If I let myself be influenced very much by others' praise or blame I become "outer directed" rather than "inner directed", as some psychologists say. Then I am like a wave of the sea, tossed about by what others say.

So, how does one become so wise, that one is unmoved as a rock, whether praised or blamed? That sounds like a hard thing to do. Maybe if I remembered the saying I heard awhile ago, "What other people think of me is none of my business" I could be more like a rock. Or, if I remembered that other people's view of me, whether positive or negative, comes from their own "bubble" or perspective, and says much more about them than about me (usually) I could be more like a rock. Or if I didn't take much of anything others said by way of praise or blame too seriously, or myself either--that might work. Then I could be a laughing rock!

I do think I would be more solid, at peace, and centered if I could be less affected by praise or blame. After all, really, in my belief system, the only one Whose opinion of me really matters or is really true is God's opinion. All others are like the wind....coming and going, blustery or gentle, but having little effect on the Image of God I know I AM.

Have you found ways to be unmoved as a rock in the face of praise or blame?